Monday, April 1, 2013

Turning over a new leaf

I had an epiphany this weekend.

I have been going about my life all wrong.  I was focusing on the wrong things.  I really thought I was something, what with cooking and reusing things and trying to be creative. What with working and being careful with my money, as if I had a mind for that sort of thing.

I've been selfish, not thinking of other people, and one of those terrible, insufferably driven women who will get what they want at any cost.  I had no idea how much I was hurting people.

Well, no more!

I pledge, from here on out, to stop hoarding my money so selfishly and to buy bigger and better things.  I pledge to stop being so selfish and arrogant, and do something about my looks.  I am going to schedule an appointment with a plastic surgeon this week.  I cannot believe I have walked out of my house not looking my very best every day--regular grooming and dressing won't cut it.  I have a credit card, why not get new clothes every week and new cosmetics and highlights every month?  It's shameful that I have not contributed to the economy by buying more stuff.  That I have not even considered that I could add to the economy and improve my standard of living by buying a much bigger house with no money down.  Yes, I would be paying much more in interest, but think of the jobs my revenue would generate! Think of the fuel I'd be adding to our sputtering economic engine.

From the bottom of my heart, I do apologize. 

6 comments:

  1. hehehe...

    Tongue in cheek, right?! ;)

    lol

    ReplyDelete
  2. LOL!! Happy April Fool's Day to you too!

    ReplyDelete
  3. April fools day...right....right......

    ReplyDelete
  4. For a moment, I thought you had lost your mind. But, you went so far that I knew it had to be a joke. Happy April Fool's Day to you. You got me for a moment.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Heheheheheheheheheheh!

    Happy April Fool's everyone!

    ReplyDelete
  6. You should be sorry. How dare you hold back the economy by being smart with your money.
    Happy belated April Fools.

    ReplyDelete